Xmas is coming

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The big Big topic of conversation in the shop at the moment is--'What's dirty old Santa bringing you for Xmas?'
Last year I asked for something with a pierced belly button , did I get what I wanted? no Chance. Year before I asked for something in a pink crop top, no chance.
I think possibly I'm being too subtle and people don't really understand what I really want. I'm in my late forties fat and bald. This year I'm asking for that actress that plays Bridget Jones. Forget the pierced belly button request, the tattoo and the space hopper. I'll settle for Renee. Hope this is direct enough for you Mum.
Johnny says he'd like a nice book of poems and a box of tea bags since he drinks all ours.
Lynda says as long as it wears trousers it'll be ok. She may end up with Wallace and Gromit
Mark says he wants pipe and slippers and a set of furry dice with a go faster stripe
for the Rascal.
I'm looking on Ebay for something for Trisha , there's some really good stuff under 'weird'. We've been married for over 20 years and it's hard to surprise her now. This one may cause her eyebrows to lift a bit on Xmas morning Stuffed piranha for sale
Cheers
Peter

November Chills

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It's freezing in the shop, the heating is alright if you're wearing a coat so the customers are warm but we're running around trying to keep from seizing up. After the big investments of the new double glazed front windows I thought it was going to be nice and cozy but the brass monkeys are moaning again.When we had the new signs put outside the shop we found that behind them was just a big hole into the shop. The 60's pegboard over the windows on the inside only managed to slow the wind down a bit. It's been like a fridge in here for 30 years and we never knew why. After all that time I don't know if I can stand the heat.
Mark will have to go out to B and Q in the Rascal and purchase some big sheets of insulation. Harry next door is very reasonable for that foam stuff that comes in cans.We'll cut up the insulation and glue it in with the foam. I think we can do it on the cheap which suits me fine.

Cheers
Peter